I have always believed in having an executive coach and it helps me as I coach others in my practice. Below is a summary of a session I had with Mike Todd as my executive coach.
Several years ago, during one of my sessions with my executive coach, my assignment was to start reading “Egonomics” by David Marcum and Steven Smith. I will be honest: I had a challenging time getting through those first few chapters. It was not exactly a page-turner at first. But I was encouraged to underline key takeaways and jot down notes, so I gave it another go—and the second time through, it hit differently.
That is when the core idea of the book clicked for me: Ego can either be our greatest asset or one of our most costly liabilities—both individually and organizationally. It is not just about personality; it is about performance, culture, and ultimately, profit.
The quote that stayed with me the most is from William Law:
“Every good thought that we have, and every good action that we perform, lays us open to pride, and thus exposes us to the various assaults of vanity and self-satisfaction.”
Let that sink in. Ego, when left unchecked, infiltrates decisions, relationships, and culture. And though it may be invisible on a company’s profit-and-loss statement, it still affects the bottom line. Research even estimates that unmanaged ego can impact revenue by 16 to 20% annually. That is not just a leadership issue, it is a business issue.
So, I thought, what should my response be to this being a business issue?
The first step is to stop thinking of ego as inherently bad. Ego, when healthy, can be an asset—the source of confidence, conviction, and the ability to lead boldly. But when it tips into defensiveness, arrogance, or the need for constant validation, it counterfeits our strengths and undermines our effectiveness.
In today’s competitive environment, we need leaders and teams that are confident, not boastful or controlling. And that starts with understanding our own ego and how it shows up in the workplace.
Here is where it got real for me: unmanaged ego does not just affect performance. It impacts recruiting, retention, and culture. If your workplace has too many unchecked egos, you will struggle to attract top talent—especially the kind that values growth, collaboration, and engagement over ego and entitlement.
When hiring, it is crucial to recognize the counterfeit versions of real talent. Watch for signs like:
- Competitiveness disguised as collaboration.
- Defensiveness mistaken for passion.
- Highlighting their brilliance instead of sharing credit
- Seeking approval for self rather than showing authentic drive
In contrast, look for the kind of people who truly elevate a team bring:
- Humility – the ability to listen, learn, and adapt.
- Curiosity – a hunger to grow and improve.
- Veracity – a commitment to honesty and integrity
These are the traits that build strong cultures and resilient companies. And the same goes for leaders.
I left that coaching session with a deep desire to keep learning about ego—how it shows up in me, in my team, and in the culture, we are building. And while “Egonomics” planted the seed, another book, “The Master Coach,” reinforced the idea that coaching is not just something leaders provide—it is something they need.
We all need a coach. Someone who holds up a mirror, challenges our blind spots, and helps us grow.
If you are considering collaborating with a coach, reach out. I am happy to help—or connect you with someone who fits your needs. There’s real value in the coaching process, not just for executives but for anyone serious about becoming a better version of themselves.
My desire is to keep learning, keep leading and keep my ego in check. Above all I want to avoid the negativity of pride as described in the Bible which is also a challenge.